Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
