she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
