I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
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