i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
