i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
