Princesses don't give blow jobs
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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