why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
My penis needs a shock collar
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
