He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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