I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
