Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
