What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
