you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
are you so shy because you have an std?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
