Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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