i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Randomize
