Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Randomize
