fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
this boner is exhausting
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Floor bacon is actually really good
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