what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
What did we do last night that was yellow?
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize