tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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