Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I know her cup size but not her name....
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