Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
