everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
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