The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
