So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
