we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I looked at my own cervix.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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