That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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