But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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