GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
