i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
