party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
