Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
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