He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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