No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Randomize
