I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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