So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
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