Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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