Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
whose ass print is on the piano?
I AM VODKA MAN
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
