the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
two words...techno handjob
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Randomize
