I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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