He kissed a someone with a penis
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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