just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
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