i just google imaged poop.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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