I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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