I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
