Pants 0. Shit 1.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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