Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
