It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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