Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Randomize