Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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