oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
this is an emotional support booty call
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
