Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize