I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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