Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
It's rum buckets o'clock
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
