Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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